I can't believe it's been since August that I've last written! Time flies! I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. During Christmas we went to West Yellowstone with my family and then on to Utah. While there, my family got together and had one of our "Family Conferences." We were to talk on a topic of our choice. Mine was on talents, and on further contemplation I came up the previous posting.
We've been busy, like all of you. I'll try to write more this year, as a New Year's resolution. =)
~Robbin
Monday, January 25, 2010
Motherhood and Talents
I have a binder where I keep lots of stuff. It has the kids' school schedule, ballet schedule, and my calendar, my goals, my budget...you get the idea. In it I also have just one talk, printed out from conference a couple years back. It is entitled "Daughters of God," by Elder M. Russell Ballard. I keep it in there as a reminder of who I want to be and what's most important.
I still remember the spirit I felt as I listened to it and the peace it brought me. He addressed Mothers first, then Fathers, then children, all about how to support mothers. I remember my son, who was in trouble for being too wild at the church, looked up at Elder Ballard and sat very still. He seemed to be really soaking it in.
I know I have felt frustration at times as a mother. I have felt like I'm watching others live life while I sit at home and pace, like a tiger in a cage. It has been hard at times emotionally, physically, intellectually, and socially. There are hard times, but there are also moments where you look back and say, "look at all the good I have done. Look how much I've grown. Look how much love I have in my life." Even as mothers, we are still daughters of God. He loves us and wants us still to grow and blossom. It's all about balance, and doing things at the right time for the right reasons.
I think Elder Ballard says it best:
"I'm impressed by countless mothers who have learned how important it is to focus on the things that can only be done in a particular season of life... The most formative time of all, the early years in a child’s life, represents less than one-tenth of a parent’s normal life. It is crucial to focus on our children for the short time we have them with us and to seek, with the help of the Lord, to teach them all we can before they leave our homes.
"We need to remember that the full commitment of motherhood and of putting children first can be difficult... There are moments of great joy and incredible fulfillment, but there are also moments of a sense of inadequacy, monotony, and frustration. Mothers may feel they receive little or no appreciation for the choice they have made. Sometimes even husbands seem to have no idea of the demands upon their wives.
"What can you do, as a young mother, to reduce the pressure and enjoy your family more?
"First, recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction.
"Author Anna Quindlen reminds us not to rush past the fleeting moments. She said: 'The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. … I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less' (Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11).
"Second, don’t over schedule yourselves. We live in a world that is filled with options. If we are not careful, we will find every minute jammed with social events, classes, exercise time, book clubs, scrap booking, Church callings, music, sports, the Internet, and our favorite TV shows... Families need unstructured time when relationships can deepen and real parenting can take place. Take time to listen, to laugh, and to play together.
"Third, even as you try to cut out the extra commitments, sisters, find some time for yourself to cultivate your gifts and interests. Pick one or two things that you would like to learn or do that will enrich your life, and make time for them. Water cannot be drawn from an empty well, and if you are not setting aside a little time for what replenishes you, you will have less and less to give to others, even to your children. Avoid any kind of substance abuse, mistakenly thinking that it will help you accomplish more. And don’t allow yourself to be caught up in the time-wasting, mind-numbing things like television soap operas or surfing the Internet. Turn to the Lord in faith, and you will know what to do and how to do it."
It is easy to feel guilty for spending time doing things that replenish our wells. Even Seth at times has forgotten to take time for himself. He is so good at giving me time to cultivate my own talents, so, I've tried to allow him quiet time to read his scriptures, go running, Hometeaching, or just to talk on the phone with family members. We need creative outlets and a break from the monotony, but not in a way that they cause stress and overwhelm.
There have been times when I've had rehearsal, Seth's been out of town, and hiring a sitter hasn't been an option. I have had to tell people I just won't be there. Playing my viola in the community is an incredible outlet for me. I am amazed how much better I am becoming at it also, little by little overtime. But it is not the most important thing in my life. I've been fortunate because my quartet or symphony members have said in reply at those times, "That's okay, we understand. Enjoy this time of life--it goes so fast." I've also had people outside of the church tell me I'm their hero and they've told their daughters or granddaughters about me. At first I thought it must be because I'm such an awesome violist =), then they tell me it's because I'm a full time mother. That has been very surprising and humbling to me. They tell their daughters to keep going. They know it's hard, but it's worth it. They can do it.
And it is worth it.
The world tells us you must be educated, have a career, be skinny and beautiful to be successful. I've had everyone from Young Women leaders to random people in the grocery store inadvertently or directly inform me of such. But in twenty years it won't matter if you wore a 14 or an 8 in jeans, had a successful career, or a perfect house. It might matter what you taught for FHE though, or that you were home everyday when your kids came home from school.
The thing I'm continually being taught is life is only about what you choose to do with it. We cannot control our surroundings at times, we can't control if we lose loved ones, and sometimes we haven't lived up to what we feel could have been our full potential or our "dream life." Join the hundreds of thousands possibly millions who have felt the same way. I am becoming more convinced that truly successful people are those who are grateful for what they have, and choose to be happy despite outside circumstances. Not an easy thing to do. Just remember you are a daughter of God, as well as a mother, and he will help you to know what's most important in your life.
I still remember the spirit I felt as I listened to it and the peace it brought me. He addressed Mothers first, then Fathers, then children, all about how to support mothers. I remember my son, who was in trouble for being too wild at the church, looked up at Elder Ballard and sat very still. He seemed to be really soaking it in.
I know I have felt frustration at times as a mother. I have felt like I'm watching others live life while I sit at home and pace, like a tiger in a cage. It has been hard at times emotionally, physically, intellectually, and socially. There are hard times, but there are also moments where you look back and say, "look at all the good I have done. Look how much I've grown. Look how much love I have in my life." Even as mothers, we are still daughters of God. He loves us and wants us still to grow and blossom. It's all about balance, and doing things at the right time for the right reasons.
I think Elder Ballard says it best:
"I'm impressed by countless mothers who have learned how important it is to focus on the things that can only be done in a particular season of life... The most formative time of all, the early years in a child’s life, represents less than one-tenth of a parent’s normal life. It is crucial to focus on our children for the short time we have them with us and to seek, with the help of the Lord, to teach them all we can before they leave our homes.
"We need to remember that the full commitment of motherhood and of putting children first can be difficult... There are moments of great joy and incredible fulfillment, but there are also moments of a sense of inadequacy, monotony, and frustration. Mothers may feel they receive little or no appreciation for the choice they have made. Sometimes even husbands seem to have no idea of the demands upon their wives.
"What can you do, as a young mother, to reduce the pressure and enjoy your family more?
"First, recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction.
"Author Anna Quindlen reminds us not to rush past the fleeting moments. She said: 'The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. … I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less' (Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11).
"Second, don’t over schedule yourselves. We live in a world that is filled with options. If we are not careful, we will find every minute jammed with social events, classes, exercise time, book clubs, scrap booking, Church callings, music, sports, the Internet, and our favorite TV shows... Families need unstructured time when relationships can deepen and real parenting can take place. Take time to listen, to laugh, and to play together.
"Third, even as you try to cut out the extra commitments, sisters, find some time for yourself to cultivate your gifts and interests. Pick one or two things that you would like to learn or do that will enrich your life, and make time for them. Water cannot be drawn from an empty well, and if you are not setting aside a little time for what replenishes you, you will have less and less to give to others, even to your children. Avoid any kind of substance abuse, mistakenly thinking that it will help you accomplish more. And don’t allow yourself to be caught up in the time-wasting, mind-numbing things like television soap operas or surfing the Internet. Turn to the Lord in faith, and you will know what to do and how to do it."
It is easy to feel guilty for spending time doing things that replenish our wells. Even Seth at times has forgotten to take time for himself. He is so good at giving me time to cultivate my own talents, so, I've tried to allow him quiet time to read his scriptures, go running, Hometeaching, or just to talk on the phone with family members. We need creative outlets and a break from the monotony, but not in a way that they cause stress and overwhelm.
There have been times when I've had rehearsal, Seth's been out of town, and hiring a sitter hasn't been an option. I have had to tell people I just won't be there. Playing my viola in the community is an incredible outlet for me. I am amazed how much better I am becoming at it also, little by little overtime. But it is not the most important thing in my life. I've been fortunate because my quartet or symphony members have said in reply at those times, "That's okay, we understand. Enjoy this time of life--it goes so fast." I've also had people outside of the church tell me I'm their hero and they've told their daughters or granddaughters about me. At first I thought it must be because I'm such an awesome violist =), then they tell me it's because I'm a full time mother. That has been very surprising and humbling to me. They tell their daughters to keep going. They know it's hard, but it's worth it. They can do it.
And it is worth it.
The world tells us you must be educated, have a career, be skinny and beautiful to be successful. I've had everyone from Young Women leaders to random people in the grocery store inadvertently or directly inform me of such. But in twenty years it won't matter if you wore a 14 or an 8 in jeans, had a successful career, or a perfect house. It might matter what you taught for FHE though, or that you were home everyday when your kids came home from school.
The thing I'm continually being taught is life is only about what you choose to do with it. We cannot control our surroundings at times, we can't control if we lose loved ones, and sometimes we haven't lived up to what we feel could have been our full potential or our "dream life." Join the hundreds of thousands possibly millions who have felt the same way. I am becoming more convinced that truly successful people are those who are grateful for what they have, and choose to be happy despite outside circumstances. Not an easy thing to do. Just remember you are a daughter of God, as well as a mother, and he will help you to know what's most important in your life.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Summer Fun Has Come To An End
The summer has flown by!! And the last month has been jammed packed! We had 3 birthdays, a baptism, tons of family come visit, camping trips, a yard sale, and let's not forget the newest addition to our family--my new fridge!!!
Eliza was baptized on the 15th of August. So, Seth and I are officially old now. We had a lot of family come out, and we enjoyed seeing them sooooo much!! After the baptism we went to Hawaii--well sort of... But the kids didn't seem to mind it wasn't the real thing. It was a very special day for our family.
Len turned 6 this month too. We had a rockin' party with a whole lot of kids! He had so much fun! It was mad chaos--just Len's style! First we had a dragon egg hunt, then they hatched their eggs by warming them up in their armpits (Seth's idea.) Inside was the name of a dragon, and they each drew a picture of what their dragon looked like. Everyone also got a dinasaur off of Len's cake. Very cheap party, and a whole lot of fun!
And Seth turned 31! We went on our first just us and kids camping trip. And we survived!!! (Actually it was so much fun! We will definitely go again!) We roasted hotdogs for dinner, then had strawberries and whipped cream over Twinkies for Seth's cake. The next day we fished and swam in the lake. The kids and I got Seth a foot water bath--one of our new favorite Friday night past times--foot massages. (Thanks to Brenda for hooking us =)
And Eliza turned 8! We let her have a few girls over to spend the night.
Before family came I had a yard sale with my friend too. It was kinda fun--and I made $250, not bad!
More summer fun--
Eliza was baptized on the 15th of August. So, Seth and I are officially old now. We had a lot of family come out, and we enjoyed seeing them sooooo much!! After the baptism we went to Hawaii--well sort of... But the kids didn't seem to mind it wasn't the real thing. It was a very special day for our family.
Len turned 6 this month too. We had a rockin' party with a whole lot of kids! He had so much fun! It was mad chaos--just Len's style! First we had a dragon egg hunt, then they hatched their eggs by warming them up in their armpits (Seth's idea.) Inside was the name of a dragon, and they each drew a picture of what their dragon looked like. Everyone also got a dinasaur off of Len's cake. Very cheap party, and a whole lot of fun!
And Seth turned 31! We went on our first just us and kids camping trip. And we survived!!! (Actually it was so much fun! We will definitely go again!) We roasted hotdogs for dinner, then had strawberries and whipped cream over Twinkies for Seth's cake. The next day we fished and swam in the lake. The kids and I got Seth a foot water bath--one of our new favorite Friday night past times--foot massages. (Thanks to Brenda for hooking us =)
And Eliza turned 8! We let her have a few girls over to spend the night. 
Before family came I had a yard sale with my friend too. It was kinda fun--and I made $250, not bad!
More summer fun--
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Harry Potter
I know! It's only been 2 weeks and I'm actually posting again! What's made me do it? My unending love for Harry Potter, of course. Yes, I'm a geek.
I got to go see the first showing at midnight in the theaters. Our small town theater was...interesting. Apparently black mini skirts (and I mean microscopic--I am in California) and blond bobs are the new "Harry Potter" fashion. It was a theater full of teenagers--but keeps me young, right? (or grateful to be growing up.) At any rate, I actually loved the movie--except for all my favorite parts of the book they left out...
I had a really fun time at the Harry Potter Party I went to. We had English food, including pumpkin juice. My favorite was the french-fry and butter sandwiches, called "Botty sandwiches," (atleast that's how my English friend pronounces it.) What goes better with potatoes fried in grease than butter? I ate 2.
While I was doing that, Seth had a Harry Potter Party at home with the kids. They ate less exotic food. They were also supposed to watch a less exotic rating, but Seth didn't know that. The kids handed him the one they wanted to watch, which was The Goblet of Fire (rated pg-13). They're still talking about it. George brought me a screaming egg the other day, and Len has pet dragons outside he regularly feeds. If only we could get him to feed the dog...
So, who makes the best Harry Potter in our look-alike-contest? Any votes?
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Rules To Follow When Painting
My friend assured me painting a room is so easy. I had my doubts, and now I see that in certain circumstances that might be true. But not in our house. Here are some pointers from one who now knows:
1--Make sure you buy enough paint to cover the entire room.
2--Especially if it's from the clearanced mistinted selection of your local Walmart, which despite being a great deal, is very difficult to match if you have to buy more, and may make it so you have to repaint it all.
3--If you do run out of paint, don't waste your time pulling out all your half-filled cans of leftover paints, mixing them together trying to get something close to what you already have on the wall.
4--Then definitely don't waste your time painting your walls with the color you came up with. Especially if you don't have enough (refer to suggestion #1.)
5--When taking a break, don't leave open cans of paint out for your kids to find, especially if they are your half-filled cans of leftover paint. That may also make it necessary to repaint.
6--When you have reached what seems like the end it is the crucial moment to be smart, aware, and learn from past mistakes. You have reason to feel proud, despite turning what should have been a couple hours project into a full days work. You made three different tints of the same color finally work successfully and subtly throughout the room. You managed to get that last bit of that great deal of a paint on a lot of the walls and the entire ceiling, had just enough of your own special concoction to put on the partial ceiling and wall, and then barely got by with that new paint (which you had to pay full price for at Walmart, which ended up being slightly too dark) on corresponding walls so nobody would ever notice they were different colors! Good for you! Now whatever you do, learn from past mistakes--don't leave out open cans of paint, especially paint pans and brushes. With three different tints of the same color all nearly run out, it would be tragic indeed if little creative hands found such devices lying about, and then were let loose in such a volatile room. That would be how you make a two hour project into a two day project.
1--Make sure you buy enough paint to cover the entire room.
2--Especially if it's from the clearanced mistinted selection of your local Walmart, which despite being a great deal, is very difficult to match if you have to buy more, and may make it so you have to repaint it all.
3--If you do run out of paint, don't waste your time pulling out all your half-filled cans of leftover paints, mixing them together trying to get something close to what you already have on the wall.
4--Then definitely don't waste your time painting your walls with the color you came up with. Especially if you don't have enough (refer to suggestion #1.)
5--When taking a break, don't leave open cans of paint out for your kids to find, especially if they are your half-filled cans of leftover paint. That may also make it necessary to repaint.
6--When you have reached what seems like the end it is the crucial moment to be smart, aware, and learn from past mistakes. You have reason to feel proud, despite turning what should have been a couple hours project into a full days work. You made three different tints of the same color finally work successfully and subtly throughout the room. You managed to get that last bit of that great deal of a paint on a lot of the walls and the entire ceiling, had just enough of your own special concoction to put on the partial ceiling and wall, and then barely got by with that new paint (which you had to pay full price for at Walmart, which ended up being slightly too dark) on corresponding walls so nobody would ever notice they were different colors! Good for you! Now whatever you do, learn from past mistakes--don't leave out open cans of paint, especially paint pans and brushes. With three different tints of the same color all nearly run out, it would be tragic indeed if little creative hands found such devices lying about, and then were let loose in such a volatile room. That would be how you make a two hour project into a two day project.
The Car Hit the George and the George Won
We’re back from Utah. It was nice to see all who we were able to see! And we are sad about those we missed. Seth is sad that he missed everyone. And I am sad he wasn’t able to come with. The kids loved playing with cousins, especially staying at Nathan and Dorene’s house. Eliza told me this morning how awesome it is that Emma gets to walk to church. We agreed—that is pretty awesome.
We were able to go up to Logan the day before we left. I arranged to meet some friends at the park for lunch. As I pulled up I worried for a minute whether we’d be able to find each other. I decided to just park and try to find them near the playground. I picked a nice shady spot, which happened to be across the street from the park. I realized at the time that wasn’t the wisest thing to do, but I rationalized that it would keep the car cooler, and my kids are great kids, they wouldn’t just run across the road, right?
Ha—so I opened the car door, and they bolted. Well, I should say George bolted. I yelled at him to be careful and sent Len after him. I should have freaked out a little more I realize now. As I began to unbuckle Clara, I noticed two things at the same time: George and Len were running back towards us, and a car was coming down the road. I yelled for them to stop, holding out my hands. Len stopped, but not George—he ran faster. I took enough physics classes to understand that George traveling as object A, and the car as object B would collide if they continued in their current directions and velocities. And this knowledge caused me to panic. Which may have saved George’s life, because the woman driving seemed aware that she needed slow down a little and watch. She could have never anticipated George jetting out in front of her though. A large black vehicle parked on the side of the road blocked her view of George, as well as George’s view of her. She slammed on her breaks the moment she saw him, but she still hit George. I screamed. It was the most horrible moment I think I’ve experienced thus far in my very limited and inexperienced life, including natural childbirth. =) George jumped up off the ground as quick as he’d been hit. I ran to him, and amazingly he seemed completely fine. He of course was crying, but he only had scraped up legs from the road. It was truly a great blessing from the Lord.
In the meantime, Len ran to the car crying, and Eliza was still in the car with Clara while all this happened. A woman in a wheelchair was crossing the road in the distance and called 9-1-1. I felt this was unnecessary at the time, but later was grateful because of having it legally documented, and also the paramedics who were then able to check him out more thoroughly. Within minutes we were surrounded by police cars, a fire truck, and an ambulance—I needn’t have worried about my friends finding me there. The whole park was aware of us. Only in Utah (and maybe only in Cache Valley) would I have found a more kind, clean-cut group of emergency help. George wouldn't talk to anyone though. He just sat in his car seat and hung his head like he was in trouble.
It’s weird but the experience reminded me of Len and all the things we went through with him in Logan—everyone was amazing, and I felt it was a huge blessing in our life at the time to be there and to have that help. Now, again, I was filled with enormous feelings of gratitude to those who were there helping and the type of people they were, as well as for our Heavenly Father who gives us life. I kept wondering what I’d done to deserve it. I felt that everything good I’d ever done had not amounted to that great blessing of being able to walk away holding my little George alive and unharmed.
I held myself together pretty well through it all, but five minutes after everyone was gone, and I was with my friends I had to go find George who had run off (again) and I just knelt down next to him and held him and cried, “I could have lost you…” He gave me the tightest hug like he understood and gave me one of his slobbery George kisses to say “It’s okay, I’m here, and I’m sorry.” Since then he has held tightly to my hand when we go anywhere, and I’m so happy for that. It took me a solid hour before I felt myself stop shaking. I asked the kids later about their reaction. Eliza said she felt like she couldn’t stand, her legs were so shaky. We talked about the prayer we had that morning in the car as we drove to Logan. I was feeling a little nervous about going up there alone, and felt I needed some Divine help. We discussed how grateful we were for the Lord’s protection. I think it was a humbling experience for all of us, including George, and we all had full hearts for the rest of the trip.
My mom made a comment the next day that maybe George’s number is up, after he almost fell out of the shopping cart. I laughed, but I have been feeling the complete opposite about it. George has a mission on this earth he hasn’t completed yet, that’s why he’s still here. I couldn’t get over it, and still haven’t—everything he did from that moment on felt like such a blessing and was amazing to me—just hearing him laugh, or seeing him jump on the trampoline at our friend’s house, just being with him. I almost felt like I was seeing George for the first time. It seems like we hurry through our days, I hurry through each child, and at the end of the day I think ‘we survived!’ That day I spent a lot more time watching and listening, with a prayer of thanksgiving in my heart. I couldn’t help but imagine what our day could have been like if things had gone differently. How so many other people have had such days, and such vacations. There were even several talks last conference about such cases, which I balled through of course. We are just so grateful that we are home safe and all together.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
June Is Here!
Seth had a management training seminar in Chico this last week. We knew he would go and be so homesick with nothing to do but relax, sleep, and watch free cable TV. We knew how much he'd miss Clara's loud random shrill screams, the car sickness, all the noise, chaos, and sleepless nights--so we decided to help him out and come along. The kids made very good use of the pool and the Disney channel. We also went to Bidwell Park and the kids waded in the river. It was a beautiful city, and we had a great time! We also got to eat at Denny's...oh,yea.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
